Everywhere #ThrowbackThursday Goes, Be X’s and O’s!

Seriously. Everywhere!

Since last week, I’ve been going down the YouTube bunny hole I always went down when I first found out YouTube was a thing. I mean, that’s not something out of the ordinary, but I’ve been watching lots and lots of commercial blocks. While I love the stuff I have to offer, I bow down before the ones who provide the best 1980s commercial blocks in the world.

This week’s theme came out of sitting up on Tuesday night, dealing with sinus infection pain and seeing today’s commercial. Of course, it reminded me of a similar commercial from around the same time, with an equally catchy theme song, promoting an equally-gross product. That commercial will be here tomorrow for your consideration.

Oh, and thank you sinuses. You didn’t contribute to either product being more appealing, but you did give me an idea. You’re apparently good for something.

Aside from this, I have no idea.

Unfortunately, I do not have either commercial for this week’s theme in my collection, so I’m turning it over to the archives of YouTube Land. Today’s commercial comes from the archives of Tristan Johns (tip of the hat to you, Tristan!), and reminds us of a time that eating a certain food product was advertised as competitive eating.

No, not the hot dog or pie-eating kind, but the kind that you have to dig deep to be a winner.

These commercials came complete with catchy jingles, flashy images, and the reminder that despite all of this…this stuff is gross.

Seriously. Ew.

So…you’ve got X’s and O’s, what does that mean?

Heck yes, we’ve got flashy dancing!

No, wait, we’ve got Tic-Tac-Toe…specifically, Tic-Tac-Toe Pasta!

Oh heck yes we do! Click play, I can’t do the next thirty seconds justice!

Upload via Tristan Johns

You can’t tell me you’ve ever forgotten the commercial featuring the kid who clearly puts in 110% to be paid in Chef Boyardee Tic-Tac-Toe’s Canned Pasta. I have never been more impressed by what I’ve seen, and more grossed out (as an adult viewing this) by the fact that he’s promoting PASTA IN A CAN! Four-year-old Allison loves these dance moves. Thirty-six-year-old Allison loves the dance moves…but is totally grossed out by the idea of canned pasta.

I mean, those moves!

But OMG, they’re to promote CANNED PASTA?!

I had totally forgotten about the dancing boy and his desire for canned pasta for way too many years, until one of the Nostalgia Critic Commercial Specials pointed out the absurdity of the commercials that featured Canned Pasta Competitive Eating, but paid particular attention to the Tic-Tac-Toe’s commercial.

Jeez, that doesn’t even look appealing in the commercial. Was this stuff actually good?

Asking for a friend. I’m Italian, and this stuff is…wow.

I mean, it is insanely over-the-top, and that kid is clearly overly excited about the prospect of lining up either three O’s or X’s (or just the ability to get to eat the stuff), but either way, you know this stuff sold well.

I’m not sure when Chef Boyardee stopped encouraging kids to competitively eat their X’s and O’s, but the product was first introduced in 1987. Chef Boyardee is still around, still loading up grocery store aisles with canned pastas (and even microwave-safe container pastas), and this commercial…is still making me laugh, years after it was re-introduced to me.