Be warned: The content herein may cause perfect strangers (and regular viewers) to have a mind blown kind of moment. They’ll question what they saw, know what they saw exists, and they’ll try to figure out how they can have one just like it.
Prepare for that moment, friends.
Yeah, prepare yourself. Because I’d like to think I’ve been preparing for something like this my entire nostalgic life, and I still couldn’t believe it.
I filing today’s commercial under the more unusual aspects of my archives, mostly because I figured something this strange could not have possibly existed, but actually did.
The year was 1988, but felt like THE FUTURE (!) as 1988 depicted it. Remember those older movies that took place in the far off world of 2005 (or some other year after the 2000s?), and we were so surprised by the possibilities of the future?
Well, I’d like to think that the future also includes Sato Time Rings.
Oh, you’ve never heard of Sato Time Rings?
Well, prepare to be blown away!
Click play already! The suspense must be killing you!
Have you recovered from what you’ve seen?
Well, you’ve seen it:
So you know it exists!
Sato Time Rings – it’s a beautiful ring and a precision watch all in one amazingly tiny package. For men and women and women, in gold and silver…
It is a stunning wearable that is sure to attract all kinds of attention. In fact, the commercial warns you of this “attention”:
I was expecting “Except no substitutes,” but I got this instead. The prospect of attention (unwanted at that) from total strangers wanting to touch my hand. Not since my engagement ring revealing has there been a more “I must see this RING!” type of moment.
But hear this!
Amazing, attention-seeking, and affordable.
Also known as “shown on regional television to the five people staying at at midnight to witness this…”
Second ring at half price…but only if I call in the next half hour?!
Where do I buy mine from?!
Shutup and take my money. You accept Visa? Here, take mine. I need all the Time Rings!
So um, yeah. This.
The Sato Time Ring, from what I gather, was the first of its kind – a watch-ring hybrid (or a ring-watch hybrid), beautiful in looks and precise on time. Not since the time in high school with that cool watch I used to clip on my clothes like some girlie pocket watch (it was shaped like a butterfly!), or my digital pets I used to do the same thing with has anything looked this cheesy and gimmicky. Look at the name of that company – Trends Action Marketing Corp. Sato was trying to create a trend, and it took a company with “TREND” in the name to make it happen!
And with a company name like that, you wouldn’t be surprised to know that I can’t find anything about them, right? Didn’t think so.
Products like this still exist today, but damned if the 1980s didn’t try to make it look so…futuristic and badass.
For a watch. Ring. Watch-ring. Ring-watch.
Oh, who cares?
Wait, we do care!…about the feature of time-telling wearables as we know them!
TIME RING! Catch the awesomeness of TIME!
So um, yeah, Time Ring. If your mind wasn’t already blown each week, perhaps it was today!
Anyway, we’re just getting started on bringing out the weirdness in advertising. Come back tomorrow for another product that you wouldn’t believe exists!
The 80s, folks. It was a special time!