She’s (Not) Crafty

Confession time: The title describes me.

Yes, let it be said: I’m not crafty.

I’m the victim of a crafty mind, the deceptive ability to envision something amazing in my head, only to be fouled up in my not-so-capable hands.  The final product, I fear, never looks like what I envisioned.  It’s a trait passed onto me by my mom…who didn’t inherit it from her mother and grandmother.  My grandmother knew how to sew and hem – she used to alter my dance costumes and sew on the pieces that needed sewing.  My great-grandmother crocheted, and made a baby doll I owned as a little kid a hooded sweater and blanket.

My mom was telling me a story about how her grandmother tried to teach her to crochet, but she was “all thumbs.”

Now, one thing I do have a penchant for is the ability to do difficult tasks with no issue whatsoever.  The problem with this: don’t ask me to do anything easy.  You want to see me lose my cool really fast?  Give me something anyone can do.  Want to see me totally in my element?  Give me something no one else around me can do.


Watch me bag the hell out of groceries.  Then stay for the epic meltdown when I can’t figure out the logistics of bagging groceries correctly.

As I said, I’m the product of a crafty mind, but am cursed with not-so-capable hands.  Small tasks of an intricate nature are usually a challenge – tangled necklaces aggravate me.  Tying tiny knots?  Yeah right.  I’m more apt to buy a new shirt if I lose a button than actually – I don’t know, I’m just guessing this is what you’re supposed to do – sew on a new button.  I used to enjoy drawing as a kid (though I was terrible at it), now I hate it because I can’t draw anything basic.

draw tippy

Freakin’ turtle.

It’s obvious that everyone has their abilities and talents.  Where the most basic, menial tasks and abilities fail me as a human being of capability (at least, in the general sense), I tend more toward having complex abilities.  My way with words, wit, and writing – three w’s that serve as some of my finer abilities – are my greatest talents.  I’m not exactly surrounded by anyone who can actually do this, and no one in my family has ever actually come forward and said “yeah, she got it from me!”, so I stake my claim to this talent.

So, it goes back to the title.  I’m not crafty in the crafty sense, but I am crafty in the impractical sense.  Which is, for everything it’s worth…crafty.

Although I do admit, I’d probably would kill it at crocheting.  🙂

draw tippy

*Shudder* Draw me and win a scholarship, my left hand.  Freakin’ turtle.


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