Time Machine Safety

From the TED-ED article on writing prompts:

Write the passenger safety instructions card for a time-travel machine.

If everything I’ve seen about time travel has shaped the knowledge that time travel is not only awesome, but unpredictable, I’d assume that safety in this type of a situation is unpredictable.

Consider this “ad,” if you will:


That said:

Welcome to the time travel machine – we will take you forward and backward to wherever and whenever you want to be.  Of course, there are some very (and we mean VERY) important instructions that will insure you safety within the time machine.

  1. Keep your arms, legs, hands, feet, head, any any other parts you’d like to remain intact within the time machine at all times.  You’d love to arrive in one piece, wouldn’t you?
  2. Look straight ahead.  Trust me, not doing so can have serious repercussions for your digestive tract.
  3. Which reminds us, don’t eat a huge meal prior to entering.  You’ll thank this manual later for that advice.
  4. Make sure your insurance is current and covers injuries to bones, sprains, strains, cuts, bruises, and injuries from dinosaur attacks.  Yes, dinosaur attacks.
  5. Bring your own weapons.
  6. Since time travel is unpredictable, we’re not sure how long we will be gone.  So be prepared…it could be awhile.  Or never…tomorrow.  I mean, have you seen Quantum Leap?!  Who knows where that guy is?!
  7. Because we basically can’t predict your return, we may not be able to predict your safety.

Remember, you answered the ad, you arrived to time travel…your destiny is not up to you.

Safe travels!!



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