Having a bad day? In a bad mood?
It’s easy to feel self-centered when something is bothering you.
I’ll admit it’s much easier to be self-centered when something is bothering me. The struggle is real when it comes to being selfless on a regular basis, so when we are angry, we are naturally inclined to not care about someone else and the fact that they too may not be in the greatest of moods either.
But, for what it is worth, consider others.
Consider how they feel. People don’t always show they are visibly hurt or insulted, but that may be a cover. If you’re like me, responses are always delayed. But I do know this: if I’m spoken to in a less-than-nice way, I get upset. Even if it delayed, what was said still affected how I feel.
Would you like it if I spoke this way to you? I hope if you’re level-headed enough, you would react the way I would expect. In other words, I hope you wouldn’t find it funny. I actually hope you would put in my place.
Ask the person if everything is ok. Be gentle about it – no poking or prodding. If they’re willing to, they’ll open up. If they aren’t, and just say “nothing” or “I’m fine,” back off. Let them be. Don’t keep trying to pursue conversation. Let it go. If you’re at work, and the person who acted this way toward you is not your boss, discuss this with them. Let them know how you feel.
My boss wants to know when someone is acting differently than normal. I know when I’m sick, I generally have mood swings. It’s been brought to my boss’s attention, and she always give me the benefit of a doubt that I’m not feeling well. I’ll admit it to her. And I’ve always found talking to her about it really does help.
Workplace bad moods really aren’t the greatest. Many (I’m sure 99% do, at least) workplaces have the “leave your problems at the door” approach to moods. Mine does, but if I really can’t leave it at the door, I will go talk to my boss so she is aware of anything that is bothering me. And if I just need five minutes away from people, the bathroom is a great place to escape. Take advantage of any place that is quiet or less populous in the office if you just need five minutes alone.
If you’re like me, you probably write down how you feel. Just put fingers to keys or pen to paper and get it all out.
This post is coming from a less-than-friendly encounter with a co-worker in my department this morning, and I did take the approach of backing off and mentioning it to my boss. Writing it down is the final step, and now it’s no longer an issue. I’ll likely avoid this co-worker today, as it’s probably good practice. But I definitely feel better now.
Some people leave it at the door, I leave it at my blog.
Have a nice rest of the day!